Thursday, July 22, 2010

Head, Shed and Shapes

Some of the stuff that Bip and Bop do, to display there anger or to show there frustrations, which I know can be one of the same thing are sometimes beyond me. The things they do to gain control or to manipulate a situation, again this also can be one of the same thing totally blow my mind.

Yet even tho they are siblings with the same disorder they are so different, they display different traits.

The meeting of a stranger:
Bip will greet them as if he has known them all his life totally engage them into something that is fascinating him and they will instantly be drawn towards him, he will have total disregard for me in the situation almost acting as if he doesn't know me.
Bop on the other hand will hold back assessing the situation, she will cling to the point of embarrassment, and be totally rude to the person who she doesn't know.

Food and Drink:
Food: If Bip was asks for something to eat and I was to say
" Well can't you wait for 20 minutes cause we will be having lunch then"
He will agree but, once my back is turned he will go steal the first thing the nearest thing he can in the shape of food, how do I know... Ive caught he enough times to last me a life time.
Bop on the other hand will wait for that said lunch to be served and then will more than likely refuse to eat it, or pick at it ... lunch & dinner can sometimes take up to an hour to eat if she is in a mood.
Drinks: If Bip asked for a drink and I ask him to wait or I say no ( which in most cases I don't have to with him) he will except this answer and go on his merry way.
Bop will go steal it ( if I have had to tell her no or to wait its cause she has probably had one recently and as she is my bed wetter, I'm more likely to monitor her with liquids) she has been known to pretend she is going bathroom and get a drink from the tap, we even went through a stage where she would drink out of the toilet, ( this still to this day turns my stomach when I picture it) and if anyone is wondering yes she has been tested for diabetes and other things.

They have (and this is a new thing that we are doing) a snack box each which each morning I fill with extra snacks for them to have through out the day, they have to ask if they an have something from their box but what they have is their choice,and if its fruit in the box I write a note which will say fruit... if its 2 pieces I write two notes and so on as all fruit is kept in the fridge, also along with the snack box is a water bottle and two fruit juice boxes, this has to last them the whole day and night along side the normal meal times which are accompanied by drinks. Bips box is normally empty come morning if not before (this child will wake in the night and if no food in his box will go in search of it) his drinks on the other hand will still be there come morning, Bop is the opposite.

Play: Bip will not and can not play alone, if he has no one to play with he will try to engage me into doing something with him, and this will always happen if I am washing up folding laundry or just doing something around the house or doing something for myself like reading, sewing a craft and so on you get the picture. If I refuse his advances to play he will stomp, storm, enrage and nearly always go off in a mood mumbling you "Don't love me".
Bop will often refuse to play with him, mainly cause he will control her to the point where if its pretend play, he has the whole story line planned out and her idea's are always a none starter to him. He will invite her to his room then five minutes later demand she gets out, only to invite her back in two minutes later, on the condition she does as she is told by HIM.
Bop needs no one, she could play by herself all day everyday, if I try to join her she will stop what she is doing and has been known to just state at me and will not allow me to engage her in what it was she was doing or be even tempted by a new idea or suggestion, until I leave her then she will carry on with whatever it was she was doing. She will play in her room for hours at a time alone if allowed to. She never asks me to play with her all she asks for is for you to set something up for her like a craft, then she will let it be known that she has the situation under control. It has been said that at school if she has been naughty and misses recces time this in no shape or form will bother her. Bip on the other hand will rage over this.

I know that no two people are the same, but if only they could display the same symptoms then I wouldn't have to learn to different approaches to everything.
in some parts of The UK they have a saying ... it goes like this.

" My Heads in The Shed, and it's All Gone Pear Shaped"

Meaning this is doing my head in and I'm totally confused.

I would say, that's pretty much how I feel today.

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  1. How was Bip & Bop when they had other children visiting them a while ago? Seemed that they played well and let you adults have your own time.

    Do you have anyone close that maybe you could set up a "play" date with on a regular basis...something for them to look forward too or does that cause to much confusion for them?

    Everyone is going to be around here this weekend if you have a chance to get away...the more the merrier! Adults for you to chat with & children for them to "play" with.

  2. Bip seemed very controlling, Bop enjoyed having someone around but only if she wanted to play at the time.... the thing is with setting play dates up is no one wants to play with them... cause they get bossy in one case and ignore in the other... cant make this weekend Mom and dad arrive Tuesday so lots to do... but thanks for the invite

  3. All kids sometimes do these sorts of things too. It helps a lot that it's only sometimes, I know, but I feel your pain...!

  4. I know Maxabella.. but this is daily .... day in day out ... it is wearing ... it doesnt seem to matter what I say they still do there thing.... but I do see progress ... so there is a positive