Friday, June 18, 2010

Let's see how this goes

So not wanting to name anyone, ...... I will call then Bip and Bop... some of you will know who Bip and Bop are some of you wont, that's ok their names are not important, just the person with the name is important.
So we tried an experiment, Bop has had an issue for the last 18 months where sometimes in the day Bop will wet herself, also every night bar a few she has been wet herself, we put her back in diapers as washing sheets everyday became over whelming and the smell "oh my life' was to much. I have a theory why this started and I can even tell you the month it started, and to say its heartbreaking is an understatement as she had been dry day and night for 18months beforehand. So the other night I held her in my arms and stroked her like a baby, read her a story, talked to her and just stroked her hair, as she began to fall asleep she whispered " Mommy can I sleep in your bed" I agreed to this and Daddy carried her upstairs. We did mover her when we went to bed so I did wonder how she was going to feel waking up in her own bed, but my hope was it wasn't going to be a problem, and I was also hoping sleeping in our bed wouldn't become an issues, but then thinking well an issues like that would be ten times better than half the issues we have right now. This child awoke in the morning bright eyed and bushy tailed and DRY. We then had two nights where she was also dry then a wet night. Did we change the program? yes we did. Then I had a few days of work and every single night she was dry until I went and removed myself for a few hours seeing the therapist on my own, and left them with a sitter, that night wet, and since I went back to work she has been wet every single morning/night. We could say its manipulation cause as adults we see deeper into things, we see the underline ..... and yes maybe it is, but is it conscious manipulation?, or is it a silent cry for something more?
I rang the therapist on this and she told me what I already knew, this child needs her mother at this moment in her life, call me her security blanket ...... call it apron strings ..... call it needy .... Ive called it all of these things before I realized this is a deep rooted problem, that she has no control over. This weekend we will start to move the house around to bring this child closers to our room, cause if putting her to bed in our bed every night helps solve some of this problem then that's what we will do, but carrying her all the way back to her room is back breaking so she needs to be closers.....


  1. She's so blessed to have you two as parents. Even with her troubles I'm sure she sees how very clearly how much you love her and are doing everything possible to help ease her troubles. There are pains the run so deep that words aren't possible and it's a comfort knowing you're seeing beyond what she can't say.